Hard day

Yesterday was the worst day here so far, thankfully it was a day among days which have been wonderful and joyous and exciting, so it was a day that is rare. I think I have become tired, of not knowing and being known.

I miss my friends in Geneva who knew me, whether it was on a small details basis, like people who knew that my favourite colour was pink and that I only drink diet coke, or that I would like a black and white kitchen when I have my own house or that I love boy bands. I miss people who knew what I look for in a guy and what my dreams of life after Uni are, or why I don’t like the word nice, people who knew what my gifts and dreams of serving God were and who let me do that…more than these things I miss knowing people, knowing what Lexie looks for in a guy and what Ashley feels God wants her to do in life and what Lebo’s voice sounds like and what career path Michael is on and why Adam has long hair and what Kerstin is reading and how to make Eyram do the vacuuming and what Bethany’s thoughts on Bible study are and what makes Chris smile and how Jerod plans a worship service and what my friends are doing after class and how many people I should reserve a table for the Croix Verte…I miss walking into a room and knowing what is going on in people’s lives and having their lives intertwined with mine.

The people we have met here so far are lovely and we could not have asked for a warmer welcome or a friendlier bunch of people to have met. I am so grateful for the people we have met in these last few weeks and the time and effort they have put into making us feel at home. I’m just tired of putting on a front and worrying so much about what I look like and what I have said and what that person is thinking and if we are making a good impression. I was told by a friend who has gone through all the re-adjusting things on my last night in Geneva that we would be ‘on’ for a while, that it would take time to know and be known. I just hadn’t realised how difficult the process can be. Much of it is pressure I put on myself or idealistic views on how life was going to be here and how quickly we would fit in. Patience is what I need.

At the zebra crossing

I feel like I am a little girl who is just learning to cross the road. The past 17 years of my life were on the footpath where things were familiar and safe and across the road was simply an idea, a thought that I had pondered but never experienced. Now it feels like I am at the crossing, maybe even on it, and I have to cross the road of uncertainty and loneliness and unfamiliarity and frustration and sadness and excitement and discovery and joy and faith and freshness to the other side, which is my new life in Portstewart and wherever else I am lead. Adjusting to this new life has brought many different emotions, most of which I am probably unaware and just experience as a whirlwind! I am so pleased to be here and looking forward to what is in store these next few years, but at the same time I miss the safe, warm footpath where I knew and was known. I have to push myself to cross over to the other side and take steps in I'm-not-quite-sure-which direction because I know that that is where I need to go. I just need to keep reminding myself to keep walking!

The last month...

One of our new friends at church today noted I hadn't blogged in a wee while, so whilst I'm sitting here watching Pearl Harbor (after having been to the actual sight, it seems appropriate!) with Kiki, who is also computing, here we go!

We arrived in Portstewart on the 17th of July. We spent our first week here unpacking boxes etc...I now have lots of sympathy for anyone moving house!! Our stuff was a day late, which was a blessing in disguise as it meant we were able to get the furniture that was here already set up, and spend the next few days unpacking. The house is beautiful, it is such a dream house for us, and we are totally not used to having so much space! The ground floor is the kitchen (that has an island and loads of room for cooking!) and dining area, a little bathroom and the garage which has become our very handy storage room :) The 1st floor is Ralph and Macy's bedroom (avec ensuite) and the big lounge, where I am now. We even have a fireplace!! The next floor up is the girly floor, with Kiki's bedroom (and....get this...walk-in wardrobe!!!), a bathroom (the shower of which unfortunately has begun to leak through to the lounge light fittings, soon to be fixed though), my bedroom (the walls were already painted pink, how perfect is that?!) and a wee lounge/study/guestroom. I will try to post pics of the house up soon. The people here have been lovely in welcoming us, we were met on our first day here by an army of people with cloths and shopping ready to do whatever needed to be done, and this river of kindness hasn't stopped flowing since then. It's been wonderful in making us feel at home and cared for, everyone has gone way beyond the call of duty and way past any hope we had!

Then came New Horizon, a Christian gathering that lasts a week and takes place on the Coleraine Uni campus. Kiki and I worked at the Getty/Townend CD table, which was nice as it gave us somewhat of a distraction from the daunting newness of life here, as well as letting us meet lots of people. Stuart and Kristyn led the worship, and it was a great thing to see/hear them as it definitely brought a sense of familiarity to our first few days here. It was lovely to get to spend time with them and other friends during that week.

And then came Hawaii!!! We were so lucky to have been given the chance to go there, it is one of the places you keep locked up in your dream-drawer in your mind with a picture of what heaven-on-earth must look like, and our time there did nothing to change this idea! The beaches are white and soft and blue and hot, with millions of palm trees everywhere you look, exotic birds and flowers in every corner, it is a historical hot-spot with the likes of mission houses and Pearl Harbor to visit, fresh pineapple and mangos and guava anywhere you go, sweet lullaby-like music and 'aloha' and 'mahalo' in the background of every scene you are in, sunrise and sunset creating such picturesque sights you can't believe it, surfers splashing religiously in the waves, quirky little eating places from all over the world, all with the sun beaming down and made even more pleasant with the wind blowing constantly on your face. I would recommend a trip to Hawaii to absolutely everyone! Have a wee look at the pictures linked in my last post - there are lots of them, so feel free to skim through the boring ones! :)

Hawaii

We had the amazing opportunity to have a family holiday in Hawaii last week, and it truly was amazing. We got to see so many beautiful places, do so many great things, meet so many friendly people, experience so many new things...I think these will all be in our memories for the rest of our lives!

Here are links to a few albums of Hawaii pics from my facebook, enjoy!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10877&l=dc909&id=509831929

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10883&l=64ea7&id=509831929

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10937&l=93035&id=509831929

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10938&l=bf8b1&id=509831929

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10939&l=09f43&id=509831929

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=10940&l=cb91d&id=509831929